I have this voice in my head, and it’s the same one that old ladies use to tell you to “enjoy this stage, dearie, because before you know it, they’ll be grown and gone!” that tells me that every day is amazing. Incredible. A gift.
And every day should be. I am thankful to be alive and to have two beautiful children who are healthy enough to drive me bonkers. I am thankful to have a living, healthy extended family, despite recent illnesses and motorcycle accidents. I had a really great night last night – I felt so well in the afternoon that I went to my exercise class and drove my heart rate up to “Bitch, you CRAZY!” levels for an entire hour and then I ate salad with chicken for dinner and talked with one of my best friends long-distance – and I am thankful for the one night’s reprieve from this crippling pregnancy sickness (I am not so foolish as to think I will experience the same luck tonight, though I will hope and pray for it).
But this morning the kids drove me extra bonkers. And while I felt great yesterday afternoon and evening, I felt terrible by 9:30 PM and spent the entire night writhing in gassy, bloated, nauseated pain (pregnancy: so magical!). So I was tired this morning, and I let Jamie play spelling games on my phone while Charles and I took a shower.
Now, I’m in and out of the shower. Wash face, wash body, wash hair, shave legs, DONE! Tony takes a little bit longer, and Charles has decided that a shower is a great place to hang out for as long as mom will let him. I left him in the shower after I finished. I brushed my teeth, started the beauty routine (lots and lots and lots of moisturizer, both to battle the crow’s feet and the impending belly stretch marks), and got my underwear on before I made Charles get out of his steamy shower. At least he’s clean, right?
But then, I couldn’t decide what to wear. And Jamie was already dressed, and Charles got dressed, so I didn’t confiscate my phone and the spelling games from them. As I tried on outfit after outfit (nothing looks good! I don’t have nearly as many maternity shirts as I did last time I was pregnant! I’m not quite big enough for my maternity dresses yet!), the boys kept playing and the clock kept ticking. By the time I finally settled on an outfit (I changed again before leaving), we were running late.
And then Jamie and Charles decided that they wanted to eat more of their breakfast. Except that Jamie had left his toast within reach of Buster, so he had to make new toast. With jam. And do it himself. And get jam everywhere, including his hair and the floor. And that’s when Charles drifted off to la-la-land and didn’t hear another direction the entire morning unless I yelled in an angry voice.
“Mom, you’re scaring me!”
“Charles, honey, I’m angry and frustrated, but I’m not going to hurt you. You have no reason to be scared. But you should be working to change the situation right now. You’re not listening. You have to follow directions. Put on your socks and shoes and go brush your teeth.”
Five minutes later…
“Charles! You haven’t brushed your teeth yet! Now you have lost Captain Underpants for the day!”
After Jamie and I changed clothing yet again, I finally got everyone loaded into the car. Which was another long, annoying process involving threats and then the loss of privileges and toys and some yelling. We got to school at 8:55 AM, and I realized that I had forgotten Jamie’s school bag. I returned home to grab it and then dropped it off, but Charles saw me when I walked in the daycare center and he started sobbing. Absolutely sobbing. He had left something in the car. I dried his tears, got his toy for him, and gave him a kiss. I finally got to work around 9:30.
Some days just suck. Some days start off rough and get worse. Some days are not amazing, except in terms of their sheer madness. My expectation is to always have a great day, starting with a fantastic morning, but it doesn’t always work out that way.
More important than how the days starts or ends, however, is how we let it affect us. Today started terribly, but I refuse to let it ruin the rest of the day. There are swim lessons tonight, we’re having friends over for dinner, and I’m making tacos. Nothing can be bad when it’s taco night.
I hope that if you’re having a rough day, you can find the opportunity to take a breath and count your blessings. It’s going to be okay. And there’s always wine and chocolate if it doesn’t get better real soon.